When one parent is the ‘fun one,’ and the other isn’t
Learn why the fun parent vs strict parent dynamic happens, how it affects families, and how both parents can find a healthier balance.
Kids often go to one parent when they want to play and turn to the other when they need help solving a problem.
One parent is quicker to say yes, starts pillow fights, lets the kids stay up a bit later on weekends, and is usually the source of fun. The other parent keeps the schedule, enforces bedtime, says no to extra treats, and takes care of the less exciting but necessary parts of running the household.
From the outside, this can look like a reasonable division of labor. From the inside, especially from the inside of the parent who is doing most of the enforcing, it tends to feel like something else: a slow accumulation of being the bad guy in a story you didn’t choose, while watching the other parent collect affection you also want but can’t seem to access without abandoning the thing you’re holding.